What if you want to do life with the right people, but don’t know how?

Life’s moving so fast these days. Social media. Work. School. Apps. Meetings. Projects. Events. Holidays. Crises. All the things.

There’s so much going on each day with endless demands on your time and attention. It’s really easy to get so caught up in trying to wrangle your to-do list into submission, that your relationships languish or even stagnate.

So, what’s the solution? More life hacks, time management tips and software, or shiny new apps to have everything all in one place?

Not quite. If you know anything about me, you know I’m all about relationships and wellbeing first before tips and tricks.

You don’t have to do life alone when you prioritise the right relationships in your life.

And that’s challenging with all the noise coming at you, so let’s talk about it.

4 Ways To Do Life With The Right People

1. Nurture Healthy Relationships

We’re social creatures who thrive in relationships.

Healthy, happy communities start in healthy, happy relationships.

Healthy, satisfying jobs revolve around healthy, invigorating relationships.

And of course, healthy, joyful families are built around healthy, joyful relationships.

Since healthy relationships are so important to our wellbeing, how often do we make health checks on the people and environments in our lives?

How much attention do we pay to the simmering tensions? The nagging feeling in our gut that something isn’t right? Or the constant friction wearing us down with that one person who just grinds our gears?

Nurturing healthy relationships is so challenging because of how fast we move these days.

The swirl of apps, likes, and shares means that we often coast on the bare minimum because we’ve tapped the heart button on Instagram or Facebook.

And all that can be fun, yes, but it’s not deep.

Nurturing healthy relationships requires depth. It means you slow down long enough to be with your people. That takes time, effort, and intention, which is why I still struggle with it, LOL. It’s real out here, y’all.

But if you really think about it, you have 24 hours to spend each day. Think of it like time capital you can invest in something beautiful and life-sustaining, something that’ll bless you and yield good fruit in your life.

So, if you make healthy relationships a priority and decide to nurture them, that changes things a bit.

You become proactive about the kind of person you want to be and who you want to be around. This raises the bar on your relationships across the board and infuses more joy in your life.

And that’s kinda abstract, so let’s break it down even more.

Let’s say I decide to nurture healthy relationships at my writing agency because I want a better environment that’s friendlier and more collaborative.

How do I begin?

I start by complimenting other writers on killer projects and giving detailed feedback on what helped me or what I learned from them. I invite them to brainstorm ideas for new pitches with me and keep things fun and engaging.

When I decide to model the kind of relationships I wanna have, it’ll make a difference in how people treat me because of how I treat them.

Eventually, when enough of us show up like that, our work culture shifts to something vibrant, friendly, and collaborative.

Healthy relationships matter because you need people where you’re going. Learning to nurture them by making the first move means life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you.

You make things happen because you’re proactive, focused, and present. And that stops loneliness right in its tracks, y’know?

2. Know Your Real Friends

I’ve felt most alone when my friends don’t seem to understand me or have time for me. I say “seem to” because I’m human, and I tend to wonder why someone hasn’t called or texted me in a while when I haven’t called or texted them either.

Maybe they’re wondering the same thing about me too. And honestly, that’s a lot of wondering for no reason. Picking up the phone solves the problem instantly, you feel me?

For me, my real friends are the people I can pray with, fast with, and open up my heart to. They’re the ones I trust with my secrets, dreams, concerns, and doubts. I take their words to heart because I listen to their advice and encouragement.

And the older I get, the more I realise that not just anyone can be in my inner circle.

So, who’re your real friends, and why do you call them that? Having a hobby or sports team in common isn’t enough. Neither is having the same job or serving together at church. It’s deeper than that, fam.

Casual friends are the ones you just hang out with and have a good time together. It doesn’t matter if it’s brunch, dinner, birthday parties, or the holidays; you name it, they’re down for it. We all need hype people in our corner, amen?

Real friends go beyond that, though.

Your real friends are the people who listen to you when you’re hurting, encourage you when you’re about to give up on your dream, and warn you when you’re on the verge of a big mistake.

That said, here’re a couple things for you to consider:

First, how many real friends do you have? Are you doing life with enough of the right people in your inner circle?

Second, how many people are you a real friend to? Are they better, brighter, and happier people because of you?

Chew on that the next time you feel like you need a little more pizzazz in the friend department, LOL.

3. Join The Right Community

Take a look at the circles you’re in right now and how they affect your life.

Which groups add joy and colour, and which ones suck out your life and energy?

The right community is a place where you can flourish, learn new things, and challenge yourself to overcome your obstacles and fears.

That means a place rife with strife, gossip, complaining, and bullying isn’t the right community for you. It doesn’t matter how popular and trendy a group is if you feel attacked and isolated there.

The right communities are healthy and energising, not toxic and draining.

Did you catch that?

The right communities are healthy and energising, not toxic and draining.

Where do you spend your time now, and are those places adding to or subtracting from your life, your joy, and your time?

4. Streamline Your Commitments

Watching what you commit to protects you from feeling alone because it keeps you out of the wrong communities that’d only isolate and harass you.

I remember telling my mum once why I didn’t have time to waste on something. I can’t even remember what it was, but I know how hard we laughed that day.

I said, “Ain’t nobody got time for that! Is it gonna bless me? Is it gonna change me? Is it gonna grow me?”

And there you have it. Stack your schedule with the things that bless you, change you, and grow you.

Do this and you won’t have to do life alone or feel forced to accept loneliness, because you’ll be in the right place with the right people.

How many of your current commitments bless you, change you, and grow you?

Show Up, Glow Up

In the end, you do life with the right people when you show up and make the first move to connect with someone or take your relationship to the next level.

Have you ever felt alone or lonely? Then you know that you tend to withdraw or isolate yourself until someone comes to draw you out.

Flip the script today.

Be the person to draw yourself out. Be the one to draw someone else out.

Decide to pick up the phone and make a date now. Not tomorrow, next week, or next month, but now.

Make the move now, because life happens now, not tomorrow. You plan for tomorrow, yes, but you only live in now. You only live in today.

How proactive are you being about the way you live now?

What’s Next For You?

I wanna encourage you today. You don’t have to do life alone or hide away in a corner somewhere. You don’t have to stay stuck in the wrong circles with the wrong people.

Nurture healthy relationships. Know who your real friends are and spend quality time with them. Join the right community. Streamline your commitments.

Don’t wait for things to happen to you. Show up to make them happen for you. You have agency in how you live your life. Use it.

Being proactive creates momentum, energy, joy, and fulfilment.

Want a handy way to do life with the right people and enjoy a richer, more fulfilling life?

Being proactive each day is a great place to start.

So, how’re you gonna do life with the right people today?

Tell me about it in the comments below. 🙂

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