Have you ever stopped something, left someone, or left a place because you were hurt and heartbroken?
I have. It’s a painful place to be in, isn’t it?
Your heart closes up. Walls go up. Joy shuts down. Every day’s a grind, a chore, a burden, and it seems never-ending.
What if there’s a better way?
Pain Is Temporary, Not Permanent
Pain’s a funny thing. It takes as much as you give it. That means you can give it years of your life, loads of your energy and attention, and all you get back is more pain and angst.
Can you relate?
But I believe it’s time for something different. I believe you’re ready for something different, or you wouldn’t be reading this.
Start Over
When you’ve been hurt or heartbroken, disappointed or rejected, starting over is the last thing you feel like doing, right? And yet it’s the very thing you need to be doing if you want to be whole again.
No, I don’t mean you should jump into a new relationship days after a break-up. And I don’t mean get a new best friend once you part ways with the former one.
I just mean being willing to shift your mindset from “This will always hurt” to “This too shall pass.”
Pain is temporary, not permanent. It feels permanent, yes, but that’s a lie. Pain heals and disappointment fades. Does it happen overnight? No, but it does happen, and that’s what matters most.
Come out of the grave of the past. Come out of how things used to be, how much you miss the old days, and how you just wish things could be the same again.
Yesterday is gone and today is before you.
What will you do with it?
There Is Grace For Today
Coming to terms with your life right now is recognising the gift of today.
There’s grace for today because you can start over today.
Hope lives in today. Joy lives in today. Life is lived today, not yesterday.
Face the past. Acknowledge it. Grieve it. And rise up into a brighter day.
Do something bold with it.
Embrace The New
What can you celebrate today as you embrace the new?
Who can you appreciate, thank, and love up on as you make peace with who you are right now and what’s available to you?
Maybe your circle looks very different from what you’re used to and it’s really painful. I get it, but if you look around you, people still love you and see you. Allow them to help you and do life with you.
Your job or role may have changed and you feel lost, but you still have value and you’re still enough.
And you may have buried a dream that meant everything to you, but you’re still alive and there’s more for you.
Other dreams will emerge. Other opportunities will come. What’s ahead is much greater than what’s behind you.
Believe that. Own that. Live like it’s true for you, because it is.
Don’t Wait To Live Unafraid
Start the blog.
Go on the date.
Take the job.
Start the podcast.
Start.
Sometimes you have to get back in motion before you’re fully healed, and that’s okay. Don’t wait for the perfect time to start over, because there is no perfect time to take the risk of opening up your heart again.
And if you find yourself asking, “What if I get hurt again?”, try this instead:
What if you love again?
What if you rise above the disappointment and come out stronger than before?
What if the pain makes you a kinder person?
What’s possible for you if you believe that this is not how your story ends?
Yes, you’ll get hurt again. I’ll get hurt again. Nobody escapes pain, but you do choose how you respond so you’re not destroyed by it.
Did you catch that?
Nobody escapes pain, but you do choose how you respond so you’re not destroyed by it.
What does this mean for you?
Staying frozen in the past destroys you if you let it. Moving forward grows you if you let it. No hurt is great enough to consume you unless you let it.
Choose Love, Not Fear
Loving again is risky. Bold. Scary.
Trusting again, trying again, is a huge risk. It can go either way.
And yet, there’s no way to move on from the past until you love and try again.
Because the tragedy is this: Shutting yourself up in past hurt shuts out new people waiting to love you and support you now and later.
Is anything in your past worth sacrificing new love, friendships, and dreams for?
Choose love, not fear. Love will always pull you up. Fear will always push you down.
There’s nothing safe about a dead life lived in the grave of the past, but there’s everything tragic about such a life.
Don’t stay in the grave with what’s dead. Dead dreams, dead relationships, dead friendships, dead whatever. Bury it, grieve it, make peace with it, and move on.
Bless it, release it, and climb out of that grave.
Because whatever it is may be dead, but you’re not.
Yaaaay Otiti Jasmine!! It’s so good to read a post from you again. I already read it 2ce for good measure.
The conclusion …. ‘Don’t stay in the grave with what’s dead. Dead dreams, dead relationships, dead friendships, dead whatever. Bury it, grieve it, make peace with it, and move on.’ Is inspired and has blessed me.
Thank you so much.
Hiiiii, Mama! You’re welcome! And thank you for reading! 😀
Amen. So happy to hear it blessed you.
It’s good to be back. 🙂
Thanks for this. It means a lot to me.
Hi, Ese! You’re welcome! Thank you so much for reading and commenting. 😀
Hope to see you here again sometime. 😊