I’ve found it’s super important to be kind to yourself on your journey.
It’s less about how much you’re doing and more about the quality with which you’re doing it.
Being kind to myself even when I stumble makes the difference between an emotional thunderstorm and a clear-eyed appraisal of what I can do better next time.
Being kind to ourselves is how we foster true growth and lasting change. We go beyond the dualistic mindset of right and wrong, and focus instead on what we can expand to create more value in our lives.
Instead of thinking,
“I’m a fat slob who needs to get her act together,”
we think,
“I choose to feel healthier through regular exercise and a more nutritious diet.”
It’s about the mindset we use to process the world, the lens that informs our vision and acts as a compass or map to where we want to be.
Kindness is a psychological skill that determines the level of enjoyment in your life and how fulfilled you feel on a day-to-day basis.
Like Brené Brown wrote, “No matter what did or did not get done today, I am enough.” When you’re able to say this, you divorce your sense of well-being from how and what you’re doing.
This is not to say doing is not important, because it is, but it’s to say that doing shouldn’t determine how you feel or who you’re being.
It’s to recognise that the fabric of who you are does not shift based on how much you’ve accomplished or what you’ve gotten wrong in the past. Your perception of who you are will continue to fluctuate as long as you confuse it with what you do.
Being kind to yourself is admitting that sometimes you’ll nail it, sometimes you won’t, and it’s all okay.
Life is dynamic and sometimes we might not ride the flow as well as we’d like, but that doesn’t mean that we’re not worthy of our own love and affection.
When we practise being kind to ourselves, we practise a radical love that shifts us from striving to thriving. We experience an emotional boost that spurs us on to discover the full range of our capabilities and what we choose to experience.
When we do this from a place of love, we give ourselves room to grow and expand in ways that would have been impossible without the love and kindness.
When we do this in order to feel good more often than not, we realise that our lives and efforts are rarely as negative as we make them out to be.
Learning to act from kindness is learning to act from love.
When we choose to be kind to ourselves, we choose to be more loving and less fearful.
Kindness is a moment-by-moment decision to see ourselves as we truly are, not as we think or fear ourselves to be.
Just because we struggle with something doesn’t mean we’re less than or stupid—it simply means that there’s something we’re yet to fully understand or resonate with. The struggle might be a sign that we need to dig deeper, or it might be a sign that we need to release that particular idea/situation/relationship. Whatever the case, our actions are informed by love, not fear.
Choosing to be kind to yourself is a sign of positive growth and lasting change.
It means that you remember you are always enough, regardless of how little or how much you’re able to do.
It means that you choose to act from love instead of fear and from a place of power instead of victimhood.
In my own life, I’ve found that being kind to myself builds up my positive self-image and self-esteem.
The more I learn to separate who I am from what I do, the more I’m able to accept myself as I am and also explore the full range of my capabilities.
This means I’m better able to navigate fluctuations in my daily wellness practices and design conditions that support those practices more often than not.
To be kind to yourself is to accept who you are right now and who you choose to be from this moment on.
It’s to know that no matter what you do or don’t do, you are enough and worthy of your own love and affection.
How has being kind to yourself made a difference in your life?
Image by Alexas_Fotos from Pixabay
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