You Can Choose

You can choose to bend your back under the burdens of feeling incompetent, operating from scarcity and despair. Stagnant.

You can choose to bow your head and fix your eyes on the ground under the weight of never being good enough for yourself or anybody else.

You can choose to live on your knees, trapped in the dark hole of your circumstances and your mind.

Or.

You can choose to rise.

You can choose to climb.

You can choose to drop the weights and make them your bridge to greatness.

You can choose to get on your feet and fight your way out of the dark.

You can choose to raise your head, straighten your spine, and face down every feeling of less than or not good enough.

You can choose to slice through your reserve and say the things you really want to say. Do the things you really want to do. Feel the things you really want to feel.

You can choose to free yourself.

You can choose to value your growth and expansion more than you value your comfort.

Choice. Intention. Action. Reaction. A consciousness that your behaviour creates your present and your future. Might as well operate from a richness of spirit, eh?

There is always a choice: action or inaction; victory or defeat; blend with your power or blend with your fear.

Blending with your power strengthens you, sharpens your identity, emboldens you to flow with your challenges and stay fluid enough to find lasting solutions.

Blending with your fear depletes you, sucks you dry, blurs the shape of your identity and leaves you at the mercy of whatever challenge you encounter, both big and small.

You can choose to ask for help when you don’t have the answers.

You can choose to spark your soul fire and guard it fiercely against those who would douse it.

You can choose to go deeper than most and trust that you’re capable of handling whatever’s buried within.

You can choose.

What’s your choice? Will you decide to flourish, not because anyone says so or pushes you to, but for yourself? I hope your answer’s yes.

Mine is. Yes.

Poster credit: Karen Salmansohn

On the Edge

I’ve been quiet for what feels like many weeks. I’ve stuffed my ears and closed my heart because I didn’t want to face one simple truth: this radiant soul shit is hard.

Mainly I’ve stopped writing much. In an attempt to provide more value with great content, I find myself waiting for the perfect post to drop into my lap like it’s some magical thing. I practically bare my teeth at the advice to “write every day” so I can improve my craft even though I know that’s really the way to go before I can become a master at this.

And at the end of it all, when I’ve spent yet another day away from pen and paper and yet another day wrapped in my mind, I find I’m still at the same place.

On the edge.

Teetering.

Feeling my world break open as I leave my old life behind me.

Wondering how to go on into the new life calling me.

Have you been here before? Have you been on the edge? Continue reading

Power. You. Here. Now.

Right now, this very second, power is bubbling within you. Energy is percolating away and straining at the seams of confinement.

Do you feel it? Do you sense it?

Power is changing the way you think and how you perceive the world, why you’re here and what you’re going to do about your life’s calling.

Do the shifts scare you? Are you scrabbling to hold tight to old ways or breathing deep to let change flow in + through you?  Continue reading

Beauty Is Magic

What’s your perception of beauty? How do you define it?

Is it limited to thin young women with glowing skin; fancy sports cars; and an exquisitely dressed fashionista?

To ask a tired question, what’s hot and what’s not?

I asked my new friend Paula if she wanted me to discuss anything in particular on here, and she mentioned society’s definition of beauty. In her exact words, “I am very interested in the way we as a society perceive beauty especially feminine beauty. As an artist I see beauty in just about anything and feel we have lost the richness that life has to offer.”

My response? “Now that’s some poetic expression. I can totally relate to what you’re saying and also feel we need to expand our perception of feminine beauty. It has nothing to do with our body measurements and/or sense of fashion; it has to do with our hearts and our souls and all the MAGIC we have to share with the world.”

I said that because beauty based on appearance alone is fleeting and shallow. I don’t care how skinny you are or how many designer brands you rock on a daily basis; if your inner self is ugly, your outer beauty is hard and bitchy. 

So, what’s hot and what’s not? Continue reading

Listen. Feel. Breathe.

Switch off from the noise and chatter

And let yourself breathe

Listen to what you’re feeling and thinking

And breathe.

Free yourself from the small talk shredding your spirit

Shrinking your vision and your glow

Raise the bar high, as high as you dare!

Life is meant to be lived fully, with your spirit grounded in the here.

This moment, this second, this thin slice of time

Merging with another, and another, to meet us at our prime

What will you say when asked how you’ve lived

If all the noise and chatter drowned out what you could have achieved?

Living Beyond Your Past

Who you were back then is not who you are right now.

You are wiser now. Braver. Stronger.

There’s nothing to gain from repeatedly crucifying yourself for past mistakes and bad experiences. So you did, said, or allowed something you shouldn’t have. You messed up and it was BAD. Fair enough, we’ve all been there.

I just have one question: why are you still visiting that hurtful and embarrassing place?

Maybe you haven’t worked through it yet. Maybe there’s a lesson yearning to be learned. Maybe you’re yet to forgive yourself or whoever’s responsible. Maybe you feel such forgiveness isn’t an option.

 Whatever the case, it’s imperative to be aware of the reasons behind your actions. How can you outgrow your past if you don’t know why you’re still holding on in the first place? How can you “let it go” while unable to discern a tight grip like your life depended on it? How can you break free if you don’t realise your captivity?

There are no quick fixes, no speedy cures. Nobody knows how long it will take to cleanse your system and free your space for positive energy. We do know, however, that whatever has happened TO you is nowhere near as powerful as what can happen FOR you. Facing what has come before will determine how you experience what can happen from now on. Work through it and open yourself up to feel and do and be so much more.

Freedom begins with intention. It continues with affirmative action. It culminates in definitive resolution.

You have to love yourself enough to stand tall and stop being a victim. Living in the past just keeps you trapped in the familiar and tricks you into believing there’s nothing beyond the narrow confines of the particular burden(s) you bear. But there is. There IS.

Choose to evolve rather than remain stagnant. Let a new beginning replace the same old ending. Grow with grace into mercy and redemption. Treat your past as a lesson, not a blueprint for your present + future. We remain as we choose to be, and we can choose the ability to stand tall in spite of what has happened to us. 

You can choose to free yourself from the shame and jettison the pain. You can decide to fashion a new way of life for yourself and be healthier, stronger. You can live beyond your past when you leave it behind you and centre yourself in this present moment. Right here. Right now. This very moment. And the next, and the next. Life can be beautiful if you let it. :)

Pull the Lever

via Amber White’s post

There are times when life is like a freight train hurtling along at full speed, keeping us rushed off our feet and leaving us frantic. We feel things are out of control and are easily overwhelmed or discouraged by challenges that seem impossible to handle or overcome.

Psst. That’s your cue to pull your emergency lever.

You are always in the driver’s seat. You decide exactly how much you let in and how much you keep out. You run the show. You ARE the boss. Continue reading

Burn that Boat!

Every week or so, Danielle LaPorte asks a Burning Question designed to make you stop and think: “Why am I doing this? Why do I want that? What will happen if I don’t do that?”

I’m a bit late because this is last week’s question (ahem), but anyway here it is:

what boat do you need to burn? a testimony to your future

To tell the truth, I think a part of me was resisting writing this post. Because the question went straight for my solar plexus. Because it smacked me upside the head and said “Otiti, you HAVE to stop doing this!”, then gathered me in for a hug and promised it would be OK. Notice how long it’s taking me to say what damn boat I’m burning?

(Inhale). Here goes.

I’m burning the boat of needing. I’m burning the boat of need. I’m turning into ash the concept that I need x to do y before I can be happy and/or fulfilled.

I need you to love me so I can validate my self-worth.

I need you to cut me some slack so I can feel better about myself.

I need to drop a dress size or two so I can feel really sexy.

Not anymore.

I choose to love me as I am and know my self-worth is immeasurable.

I choose to show up and do the work. No excuses. No handicaps.

I choose to be foxy right now, dammit, because there’s no such thing as the perfect weight or figure for all women; there’s only the perfect weight for me.

Need is an insidious thing. It swallows your power and makes you dependent on external factors + influences to be on top of your game. Ironically, it’s also a safe zone because you know exactly what you’ll get when you do certain things. Only problem is, it’s never really enough, is it? You’ll always need more. And more. And more.

Clutching need like a life raft ends today. It ends here. It ends now.

I need nothing. I have everything.

And you? What boat are you gonna burn?

Code:

The Art of Self-Love

There are times you struggle to connect to yourself and find the bright, insightful you brimming with encouragement and sheer joy at being alive. Sometimes you feel sad and weepy and you don’t even know why.

When those times come, remember this: you are responsible for your well-being. You are responsible for loving and appreciating yourself.

What does it really mean to do those, anyway?

It means to embrace all of you who are; to take things as you see them and love them anyway because who else is going to do it for you, right?

It’s a conscious decision to observe as fairly as you can and ask yourself how you would act if someone else were you: would you still disparage them as much or as often as you do yourself? Continue reading

What If?

I used to see those two words as harbingers of timidity and uncertainty: What if I fail? What if I fall? What if I’m wrong? What if they don’t like me/accept me/support my idea?

You know, that kind of thing.

Then I realised: they hold great potential. Potential. Possibilities.

What if you succeed?

What if you own the competition and go hard like never before?

What if you binned the doubt and went for it even in the face of great adversity?

What if you learned to fly even as you were falling?

Things are changing around and within me. I’m actually giving myself a chance to go with my gut and trust that it’s the right thing to do. I’m realising that all the careful planning in the world can’t match the sheer thrill of letting yourself feel on a deeper level. 

You’re so much more in tune with yourself when you think beyond the borders of what’s “real” or acceptable.

The truth is that letting yourself think wild and free is the key to authentic expression.

It’s the beat of your pulse.

It’s the difference between wondering if you’ll make it and knowing that you will.

It’s the raw honesty you get when you face your hopes and fears; when you can look at yourself, really look, and truly be thankful for all that you are and have.

Even when you’re not perfect. Especially because you’re not. We get so caught up in trying for perfection that we forget to celebrate what we have right now.

What if.

What if you discovered you didn’t have to try so hard?

What if you were kinder to yourself and didn’t allow momentary setbacks negate your progress & achievements?

What if you believed in your power and still asked for help when you needed it because you knew that didn’t make you weak?

What if you took the first step because you couldn’t wait to taste the extraordinary?

I believe in positivity.

I believe in magic.

I believe in loving yourself enough to admit what you desire and what you need.

I believe in being true to your spirit and going where it leads you.

What if we changed “Oh, I can’t possibly . . .” to “Yeah, I can totally . . .”?

I may not know your name. I may not know your story. I probably don’t know what you’ve experienced, what you’ve felt, what you’ve endured.

I only know that holding on to your past is the surest way of sabotaging your present and future.

Having the courage to work through the pain and give yourself a chance to heal is a lot harder than hugging the hurt and staying trapped in an endless loop of recrimination and dissatisfaction.

So take a chance today.

Give yourself the gift of following your heart.

Give yourself the gift of living your passion.

Give yourself the gift of being your own person.

Give yourself the gift of continuously evolving and growing.

So. Are you ready to turn your ‘what-ifs’ into expressions of power and aptitude?