Tag Archives: Compassion

The Art of Self-Love

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There are times you struggle to connect to yourself and find the bright, insightful you brimming with encouragement and sheer joy at being alive. Sometimes you feel sad and weepy and you don’t even know why.

When those times come, remember this: you are responsible for your well-being. You are responsible for loving and appreciating yourself.

What does it really mean to do those, anyway?

It means to embrace all of you who are; to take things as you see them and love them anyway because who else is going to do it for you, right?

It’s a conscious decision to observe as fairly as you can and ask yourself how you would act if someone else were you: would you still disparage them as much or as often as you do yourself? Continue reading →

Words from their Fathers – Part 2

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Here’s the rest of it; the first post would have been too long so I divided the material.

Cherie Carter-Scott’s Rules of Life 

Rule One – You will receive a body. Whether you love it or hate it, it’s yours for life, so accept it. What counts is what’s inside. 

 Rule Two – You will be presented with lessons. Life is a constant learning experience, which every day provides opportunities for you to learn more. These lessons specific to you, and learning them ‘is the key to discovering and fulfilling the meaning and relevance of your own life’. 

 Rule Three – There are no mistakes, only lessons. Your development towards wisdom is a process of experimentation, trial and error, so it’s inevitable things will not always go to plan or turn out how you’d want. Compassion is the remedy for harsh judgement – of ourselves and others. Forgiveness is not only divine – it’s also ‘the act of erasing an emotional debt’. Behaving ethically, with integrity, and with humour – especially the ability to laugh at yourself and your own mishaps – are central to the perspective that ‘mistakes’ are simply lessons we must learn.  Continue reading →

Ever Been Here?

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If you can relate to the following, if you have found yourself thinking or saying these words, you’ve been here.

 “I feel numb, hollow. I feel like it was a mistake to open up. I feel like I just want to be part of something real and every time I think I’m getting there, it falls apart. And if we were friends before, the friendship’s never quite the same afterwards. Sometimes it’s awkward, stilted, other times it just snuffs out without warning. I know it’ll be OK eventually. I just don’t know if I can trust enough to keep letting people in if they’re just going to knock me for six every single time. I know I’m probably quick to get attached, but even when I don’t start it, one minute everything’s fine and the next it implodes. I’m so tired of it, man, so goddamn tired. Tired of getting blindsided. OK so I’m not the most experienced or savvy person in the world, but surely I must mean enough to someone for him not to be a total bastard? And therein lies the rub. I don’t think I mean enough, if much at all. That’s what hurts the most.”

I wrote the above back in June, felt pretty low at that time. I never thought it’d see the light of a public forum, but maybe we need to reveal our innermost thoughts sometimes. Not because we are whining or wallowing in self-pity, but because we might be able to help others suffering similar angst. All too often when one cries out for solace, you just get empty platitudes in return, or even worse, someone tells you to “get over it”. Like you don’t know that already? *Eye roll*

Listening is an art form. It goes beyond the interpretation of another person’s sound waves. It is more than simply hearing them out and saying something, anything, to move the conversation in a more comfortable/enjoyable direction. It involves actually processing information and providing thoughtful feedback, recognising the emotions behind the words and giving the appropriate responses. Of course if the person says the same things over and over again, feel free to let them know that they might require more professional help than you can deliver, LOL.

Seriously, though. Listen. You never know when it will make a world of difference to a person in need.